Exhume the dead part of my soul...please..anyone?

I feel lost.
Somewhere between the lines I lost myself.
I can't think straight ,there is so much work to be done and I feel like doing a million things other than working on scenarios and stuff.
I feel tired.
very tired in fact. and all what I do seems do be done in a dream-like state of mind.
Exhume me , please.
Even if I scream your name over and over again you don't seem to hear me...
And I'm scared like hell that I might loose you...
That you and I change...
Will chang so much that we won't be able to recognize one another again.
That we'll keep that sick rythm up until nothing of us will remain but a pile of pounding flesh.
Your eyes...
Look at me!
Don't disappear!
Don't go to places I can't follow!
I feel old...
And I don't feel.
I should but I don't. Falling, trusting, taking over ,being taken.
First entry and it comes out like crap...
Like sentimental blah blah...I can't help it...
I feel like dust being taken by the wind.
Kaze no youni...kumo no youni ...ano sora de wo ukabu...
BOKU WA NAZE???